Whenever we go to family functions, on either side, funny things happen. They don't seem funny at the time and they don't seem funny to others -- until I put my spin on them.
The best part of most family functions is the ride home in the car -- when I tend to retell the best moments with a little, well, editorializing.
Andy, my husband, calls it rants.
I call it soliloquizing.
It's a word. I just typed it. And spell-checked it.
My latest soliloquy was about James -- Andy's friend since grade school. We invited James to a barbeque at our house last weekend. He asked if there was anything he could bring, aside from a sandwich and some beer.
I looked at him quizzically. (I have this thing where my face always gives me away. I make faces without knowing it. Needless to say, I don't play poker.) "I don't like barbeque food," he explained.
"But you just ate a burger!" I let out, before my filter kicked in.
And we left it at that. Well, we left it at Andy telling James he'd get a sandwich from this great deli near our house so all he had to worry about were beverages.
I didn't even wait for us to get inside the safety of our car.
"He doesn't like barbeque food?!?!?! He just ate a hamburger! Who doesn't like barbeque? Who goes to a barbeque and brings a subway sandwich? People are going to make fun of him."
Andy calmly listened for much longer, and simply explained, "he's a fussy man." And left it at that.
I couldn't. Two days later, James posted on his Facebook account about how he was looking forward to his Wendy's hamburger (emphasis mine)! I mean, really, because if you don't trust the food I get that but then why do you trust Wendy's and since it's obvious you like hamburgers then why don't you like barbeque?!?! (Aside from the obvious rant about really, who cares what you're eating for lunch this very minute...)
But, once again, I let it go. (Really! I did.)
When Saturday rolled around, and James sat down with his special deli sandwich in the middle of a table of my friends, I heard: "In a yard full of mostly women, I think you're the fussiest one here!" followed by 20 questions on why he doesn't like barbeque and if the sandwich has to be from a special deli with special meat, etc.
I had to run into the house to stop from laughing in front of James.
And, as we embark on the weekend of all barbeque weekends, I don't have an ounce of pity for James. He doesn't need it or want it. Because, as fussy as he is, he didn't let it bother him in the least. He may be fussy, but he's confident.
Friday, May 28, 2010
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
SHE JUST WANTS TO MOVE
I got a letter in the mail today -- it was a rejection letter for that job I really wanted.
I also met with my business partner to try and wrap things up. She still hasn't signed the dissolution agreement, even though she asked me to leave the partnership. I'm not sad about the partnership ending -- it needed to. I'm just sad about how it ended and that she thinks she can make more money without me.
There's a lot of blows to the ego lately so I'm going to have to remember what my husband says and take these lemons and make fucking awesome!
Or, take the summer off.
In other news, with the hot weather come the ants. Luckily, they're big black ants. After bragging to my friend on the phone about how we have only one or two/week (as opposed to her little brown ant-festation), I promptly killed 3 in a row! Then another 3!
So we got ant bait buttons.
This wasn't enough for me so this morning, while out in the yard with our dog, I followed the ants. As I suspected, they're getting into our apartment through a crack between the sidewalk and foundation. I wedged another ant bait button there and sent an email to my husband.
His reply: "You go after ants with unrivalled gusto. I love you."
I also met with my business partner to try and wrap things up. She still hasn't signed the dissolution agreement, even though she asked me to leave the partnership. I'm not sad about the partnership ending -- it needed to. I'm just sad about how it ended and that she thinks she can make more money without me.
There's a lot of blows to the ego lately so I'm going to have to remember what my husband says and take these lemons and make fucking awesome!
Or, take the summer off.
In other news, with the hot weather come the ants. Luckily, they're big black ants. After bragging to my friend on the phone about how we have only one or two/week (as opposed to her little brown ant-festation), I promptly killed 3 in a row! Then another 3!
So we got ant bait buttons.
This wasn't enough for me so this morning, while out in the yard with our dog, I followed the ants. As I suspected, they're getting into our apartment through a crack between the sidewalk and foundation. I wedged another ant bait button there and sent an email to my husband.
His reply: "You go after ants with unrivalled gusto. I love you."
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
ONE
In less than one week, I will cease being a business owner.
In less than one week, I will be unemployed for the first time in 27 years.
When this all happened, I immediately applied for a job. A job I think is my dream job. A job I know I will be good at.
I still haven't heard whether I got that job.
Last week, a new friend told me it was OK not to have all the answers. She advised I just sit with it for a while -- own it. I felt a weight lift off my shoulders -- as someone gave me permission to not know where I was going from here.
So, here I go -- sitting with it for a while.
In less than one week, I will be unemployed for the first time in 27 years.
When this all happened, I immediately applied for a job. A job I think is my dream job. A job I know I will be good at.
I still haven't heard whether I got that job.
Last week, a new friend told me it was OK not to have all the answers. She advised I just sit with it for a while -- own it. I felt a weight lift off my shoulders -- as someone gave me permission to not know where I was going from here.
So, here I go -- sitting with it for a while.
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